what would you do

i ran across this yesterday while reading a blog that i like to read. i was introduced to this song...maybe it's better described as a story.

what would you do...if you heard the words directed to you from your doctor: aggressive, terminal, cancer?

would you cry out to God? many of us would because it's natural when we are facing something bigger than us to turn to the One who is bigger than us.

what would be the focus of your conversation to Him? would it be me or would it be HIM?

you have to see these two video here.

candy cigarettes

i was reading a blog today from brody who was talking about candy that he remember as a kid?  

did you ever buy candy cigarettes? so amazing but so wrong!

check out this blog

check out this blog by Amos Lanka entitled "Aimlessness and Affluenza"...he brings up some great thought provoking points.

a wordle?

this morning i was introduced to a tool that many of you may already know about...but it's new to me.  i was reading Aaron Ivey's blog and found out that when you enter your RSS feed into this website, it makes a cloud of words that are most frequently used on your blog.  pretty sweet stuff!  

click on it to see it larger.  

shower time

nothing says "growing up" like taking a shower all by yourself.  no...not me, my four year old.  (it's funny how progression works in our heads.  one day we want to be all grown up and take showers alone...then we look forward to the times when we're not alone...hallelujah to marriage.)

he took his first shower all by himself and it was hilarious listening to him as i laid on my bed.  he had the removable shower head in his hand and giggling randomly.  

i can only imagine where he was hitting himself.

my little boy is growing up fast...where is this time going?

anger in brokenness

this was written yesterday...

my heart is broken today.  everything inside of me is begging for the tears to flow but anger is built up in this brokenness that has put me at a weird state.

about 5 days ago i was reading a blog posting from the Rescue Center in Haiti that i find myself checking in on frequently.  this particular story caught my attention from some reason.  this father of three was at a loss for what to do with his 6 month old daughter.  his wife died after delivering her and he could take care of her anymore.  he hiked 6 hours with her to reach the Rescue Center with a hope they could take her. 

i have been doing a lot of reading about what some, who have nothing, choose to do with their children in Haiti and found out that many families give their children away with the hope of them having food on the table, a roof over their head, and possibly an education (something you and i may never understand).  many times that does not happen but the risk is worth it for many poor families.  (nightline covered a story that sparked my interest...read these for some insight from Haitians here and here.)  this father gave his daughter to the Rescue Center in search for hope.  

she was not healthy when she came in, as many Haitian children aren't (1/5 of the children don't live past age 5), and i read today that she passed away...suffering from 108.3 temperature and seizures.  

as amazingly rough as that is...there is no way for them to let the father know of her passing.  he will come next week to visit her and find out the news.  

my heart breaks for Lori and Licia who sacrifice for and serve Haiti with all their heart...who have greater faith then you and i will ever experience in our "safe" lives and "safe" churches here in the states.  my heart breaks for these ladies who gave so much but lost this earthly battle for her life (though God is in total control).  my heart breaks for the suffering that Chabina had to go through.  i chest has had that lump in it all day...the lump that feels like i am holding emotions back...but i can't let it out.

my heart is angry because as i lay my head on my pillow tonight there is a dad who lays his head down after a hard day at work with the hope of seeing his daughter next week but the reality is after he travels 6 hours by foot...he will find out that the LORD took his baby girl home.  as a dad (not from a godly perspective) this seems very unfair.  i am broken for the day he learns the very thing that i know... but i am hundreds, if not, thousands of miles away.  

i wish i had to the means to hike to his house to share to him the bad news.  as a dad i want him to know!

taken from the Rescue Center blog...i lean on it too:

Isaiah 55:8-9

8 "'For My thoughts are not your thoughts,

     neither are your ways My ways,'

     declares the LORD.

9 'As the heavens are higher than the earth,

    so are My ways higher than your ways

    and my thoughts than your thoughts.'"

tangible vs. the unseen

it's funny how money (or lack of) will change your faith.

we sold our house here in Albuquerque and in this market that is a big deal. we even got the asking price. the only thing is we did a Real Estate Contract (REC) with the buyers which means that the responsibility of this mortgage is not totally off our shoulders until June of next year. it works like a lease to own but the house in the the buys name and we (the sellers) act as the bank. then in one year the buyers will refinance and everything will go in their name and our mortgage will be paid off... the problem now lies in the fact that this bank doesn't have a lot of money.

July 1st was the first payment due from our current "renters". Today's the 11th and, per online, the money hasn't been paid to our escrow company. With the weekend approaching and the 16th fast on it's heals (the day our mortgage is due) it looked like our mortgage wasn't going to be paid on time. WE HAVE NEVER PAID A LATE MORTGAGE!

needless to say, the Young's household has been a stressful household the past couple of days.

i had a great opportunity to be the rock for my wife and i failed. God has done so much to this point to assure us that we are suppose to move to Portland in September but i was afraid of being wrong. what if we misread God and He is trying to get us to stay here. what if...what if...what if...

my wife went to be this morning (after working her 12 hr. night shift) a wreck and stressed out with the idea that we might have been screwed on this REC deal. i chose to lean on the tangible rather then on the unseen.

the only thing that has been constant my whole life is the directions that God has taken me. my family is in the midst of God taken us somewhere and i let worry blind my sight of what God is doing, and most importantly, what He has already done. i had an opportunity to share encouraging words to my wife and pray with her before she went to sleep to help set her mind at ease that God is in control...instead i left our room (her) frustrated at her frustration and at the whole situation.

to end a long story, i will spare the details but the detail you need to know is...God is still proven to be my constant. there was a mistake in the billing and the "renters" weren't properly notified.

my heart was unsettled, worried, nervous, and frustrated...but God was in control the whole time. i missed an opportunity to be my wifes rock and that saddens me. forgive me God for my lack of faith and family leadership.

Matthew 6:25-34, Prov. 3:5-6

the whole earth is full of His glory

i am taking my own challenge...this morning i was sitting on my back porch, after reading i found myself begging the Spirit of God to break my heart for something...anything. i guess i currently feel overwhelmed by the needs that i have seen in the world and i am desperate for the Holy Spirit to clear up the call for my family in how we can "help."

help is a funny word in the perspective of serving the hungry, the orphans, the widows...

as i was sitting outside praying for a broken heart...in the midst of a calm morning i felt a gentle wind on my face. i told God how comforted i felt by it because it was like His gentle breath blowing over me. when you have a heavy heart that breath is reassuring that God is near. as i was sitting in His peace i heard the wind in the trees next door. it got stronger and stronger. the tree in my backyard, with the grass, had a strong breeze running through them. no lie, as i was sitting there i felt nothing. i could watch creation around me blow for a few seconds but where i was sitting there...i felt nothing. i opened my eyes and i tried to feel the wind...still nothing. then it all died down again and left me in wonder of what just happened.

yesterday at church we sang the the song, "holy is the Lord" and i was hit hard with the phrase "the whole earth if filled with His glory." as i was worshiping yesterday with the thought of the picture of my last post...singing the earth is filled with His glory hit me differently then before. i immediately wrote the phrase in my journal with the intent of blogging about it. i couldn't help but think that in the midst of so much suffering in the world, these people are still surrounded by the glory of God...just as you and i are as we sit here and read or type.

Romans 1 reminds us that there is no excuse for those who deny God because His glory cries out in all creation. the glory of God is all around...even (or espceially) around those who suffer.

the Spirit of God is compared to the wind in John 3...that everyone born of the Spirit is blown like the wind. as i sat and thought about my experience this morning with the wind i couldn't help but think back to the phrase of the song i wanted to write about today. maybe, just maybe, God has given me content to write about.

the angels song in Isaiah 6:3 rings nothing but truth. it is something that we need to grasp as believers. everywhere we walk, the Spirit of God is there. every picture we see, the spirit of God is there. suffering CAN be so blinding (suffering can also bring you to maturity in Christ...suffering is necessary). if God has yet to lift the blindness from the eyes of the suffering...the Wind will never be felt. as believers we have been called to be the Wind to the hopeless. "So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit (being blown by the Wind)" - John 3:8.

the breath that was so refreshing to me also was taken from me for a moment (in my interpretation) to remind me that many many people...including children...have never felt the wind of God...the wind of hope...though it is all around them. We have an opportunity to let the Wind be felt...through our lives...through our sacrifice.

Jesus has called us out as believers...we MUST act.

pray for a broken heart so that passion will drive your heart to see it to full completion. lets stop being dreamers (of who i am the greatest) and be movers (of who i am the worst).

a child cries

this poem speaks exactly what i am trying to say. i found it tonight...after i posted my last post. a part of me wants to apologize for the picture i am about to post but the other part of me has no plan to apologize. Kat's posted this picture on her blog (entitled, "please don't look away") along with her raw emotions put down in a poem. read it.





Kat's Poem:

A child cries
I build my wall higher
brick by costly brick
until I am safe
safe from need
safe from fear
safe from everything
she daily bears

A child cries
and so do we
shed our tears of excess
as she sheds hers of need

A child cries
we must cry too
for the food
we’ve withheld
from the hungry
to ensure our comfort
that was never
ours to own

A child cries
Oh God of Heaven
let me cry too
let me weep
let me mourn
for the poor
for the hungry
for the widow
for the orphan
yes, God for the orphan
please God for the orphan

for they are us
a different color
but they are us
a different place
but they are us

fathers, mothers
sons and daughters
they are us, they are us

A child cries
and I am discontent
with comfort
I have seen
death in the eyes of a child
I cannot live life for myself
alone
again

A child cries
and I must cry too
So, now
what is it that I will do?

trying again...

my research of what the 40 day fast is all about has brought up my previous thought of, do we represent God to be the god of the rich (lower case "g" on purpose...because it's a false god). in my attempt to vomit out what is on my heart, i may have made some things confusing. i want a second chance to explain myself...what's on my heart.

you know, it changes things when you think about a "revelations" you have and then also think about how your "revelation" prompts change in yourself.

my friend Marsha got me thinking about my term of "fly-by evangelism." i think i might have painted a false picture of what i was really trying to say. taken the example given in my blog, going downtown to "minister" to the homeless is necessary. i guess my greatest question is do we have any interest in wanting to understand where these people are (mentally and physically). does our heart break for them? do we accept them for who they are because outside the grace found in Jesus Christ...really, that is where we should be found!

i get sick over the thought that we might head downtown to "check mark the box" of evangelism (i can't believe i just used that term). our actions promote, "i am here to tell you about jesus but you'll never understand HOPE because you're unwilling to change your lifestyle."

the other end of the spectrum is the passionate young person who has a true drive to evangelize the world. this guy approaches a person on the streets with a wallet in his back pocket and $200 on his debit card. he starts passionatley spurting off scripture to this guys and all this guys see is a rich man who doesn't get it...a rich man preaching hope to whom most likely has never experience hopelessness like living on the streets.

God's portraied as the god of the rich.

i think the answer for us who have HOPE is that we pray for a broken heart and a supernatural understanding of the people God leads us to. we have to realize we can't change the whole world but you can make a difference. the question then must be raised, "how can i make the greatest impact."

the things i have read recently are encouraging. i think the tide has great potential in shifting...the tide of believers wanting to make a REAL difference...wanting to put themselves in the shoes of those who find themselves down, out, and near death.

my pray for you...anyone who reads this...is that God would place a hunger in your heart to live beyond yourself. that God would shatter your heart for the homeless...the widows...the orphans...the hungry. I pray that you would find a way to keep that vision in front of you (and your family) so time would NEVER heal that brokenness.

my prayer for hungry, widows, orphans...that they would see Jesus in me and in you. that they would see how you understand them though you may never full understand. that they see your broken heart and they find HOPE in Jesus Christ through your service.

i pray we get off our comfortable ass and make a difference.

the 40 day fast

i just came across this movement today. it's a blogworld 40 day fast. very unique and i am findng it very interesting. this is not a typical 4o day fast but it accomplishes more than what any one person can do by themselves and it raises awareness to people like me. as of today they are in their 13 day of the 40. if you're someone who is overwhelmed by the worlds needs...check this out. this could possibly help bring to focus some great organizations that are looking beyond themselves to change the world...one life at a time.

something that my wife and i are starting to get is the call for us a believers in Jesus Christ...to care for the broken, needy, hungry, parent-less, alone, abandoned, etc. mainly the ones that Jesus has called us to take care of and in my opinion, we, as american believers (in general..including me), have lost sight of. we have lost sight of it because we are to busy looking at ourselves. this is not bad but it becomes bad when we are so mesmerized by our lives mirror...we don't look beyond it.

join me in checking this out! leave me a comment of something that catches your attention!

check this out to get the scoop on the background and purpose of the 40 day fast.

the greatest summer television show EVER

oh my freak'n goodness...wipeout...i have never laughed so hard. go to abc.com and watch the past episodes and find out what i mean. freak'n John Anderson and John Hanson (the hosts) are hilarious. it can be compared to the old spike tv show MXC.

this makes life worth it!!!

in sight of this, nothing is worth the complaint!

we struck water in New Mexico!!!

who knew, there is running water in New Mexico...i mean besides the nasty rio grande...you can hardly call that running water. it's more like a cesspool than anything else.

i had one of the greatest days out with my family yesterday. we went out to Jemez Springs and hiked back to see the falls. remember that these are falls in New Mexico, not the great Northwest. we packed a lunch and made the hour journey to the town of Jemez Springs.


after about a 15 minute hike we got to this.



this is Stacy and the boys getting to close for comfort. it was funny the boys interest in looking over the edge but not really wanting to get too close.


here is an example of Austen's face when he's too close for comfort. this picture took a lot of coercing to get some what of a smile. what you don't see here is about a foot and a half from his left foot is about a 100 foot drop off.


this is Stacy and Austen checking out the falls.


...and me and my baby girl enjoying the scenery.

I LOVE HIKING!